I think that kind of question is along the lines of, "How're you feeling today?" for me. I mean I have my normal response.. but, that doesn't mean that's all I ever am.
I am repetitively a few things. I make every effort to have manners and act in a way most seem to have forgotten. I always make sure my make up is done well, however it is I decide to do it and I love, love, love to play with clothes. Everything's a costume to me. Even just a little green cardigan, throw on a skirt and some high socks and I am this embodiment of a new character.
I would say as a default I am playfully submissive. But, what's great about that is this kind of, energy can build up in me and I can release it in a very dominate sort of way. I enjoy so very, very much being a chameleon. I like to mirror partners I fit with. I think an ability to adjust your personality according to what you're feeling sensually is really under appreciated.
People think you have to be this 'one thing' this 'one type'. But you don't. I adore layers of plastic jewelry, pigtails and skirts. I am in love with dark, long black lace with crimson lips. I am so passionate about satin and heels. I can be whoever I decide to be everyday.
And isn't it better that way? I would think it is. The same thing, every day, in and out, snore. I wear a lot of 50's and 60's things, but in different ways everyday. My personality sexually is the same thing. I wear different attitudes.
Sometimes I long to be dominated. Sometimes I want to play, back and forth. Sometimes I'd like to say what to do. None of that makes me indecisive, as a matter of fact I think it does the opposite. I think it makes my particular personality perfect for who I decided to be. We all experienced some sort of career day, that 'what do you want to be when you grow up?' business. None of it, none ever applied to me.
I worked in the medical field for years and I loved it, but I was being a part of me. Not all of me.
Sensuality is who I am. People water down my dream as having settled or often, 'doing easy work'. No, this is what I want. It's not a huge dream to most people, it's not one most people would even entertain for a second.. but it's my niche. I love it here.
If I were stuck in a role creative parts of me would die. Right now I can be a preppy young girl one day and the embodiment of Mortisha Addams the next. How is that 'watered down'?
Here's my big bottom line. It's not just that I could be anyone's fantasy, it's that everyday I wake up and I get to be my own. What ever it happens to be, just then.
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